Relaxed and Refreshed :)

Well our little break at fingal did me the world of good, I am feeling sooooo relaxed, even though I know there is a mountain of stress ahead of me, I feel like I will be able to handle it without the 'omg I am going to have a heart attack at 34' sensation that came over me before Brisbane.


The kids had a brilliant time too, they LOVED playing with Logan, Toby and Fletcher and I loved all the lovely cuddles with princess Elliana :) Patrick was gutted that we didn't climb to the top of Mt Tomaree though, we got half way up and Maia wanted to be carried and I didn't have the ERGO, plus it was raining, so I abandoned the idea. I did go by myself the next day though and how pretty is the view from the top! No wonder I feel so relaxed there, it really is like you are away from the world, even though it's only an hour away.

I didn't have any problems being bored for the two days on my own, plenty of trashy mags, wine, long leisurely walks, chats with ness and yummy food kept me quite contented. I didn't end up having internet access, which was probably a good thing, as it meant I couldn't do work even if I wanted to, so it was a truely relaxing work free break, yay!

I didn't end up taking my sewing machine in the end, so didn't get too many things finished, I did get started on a scarf for Patrick, hopefully I can finish that before the end of winter ;) and I finally finished up maia's black cat softie, which I'll put a pic up of later. Don't think I will be getting into the softie game any time soon haha

I am still waiting for the situation with Brad to hit me, at first I thought it would be after he moved out, then I thought it would be when I got to fingal, then perhaps it would hit me when I was on my own, but I am still feeling rather numb about it all. Not sure whether I am just a cold hearted biatch, or whether it's been over for such a long time already without us realising that I've been sub-conciously processing the feelings of us splitting for months now, or what is going on. Brad thinks it is because we have never really deeply connected, and whether I ever was truly in love with him, which is a bit sad considering we have spent the last 11 years together. Maybe it will hit me later when I least expect it, but I managed to drink a whole bottle of wine to myself one night while I was away, and I although I felt very reflective and managed to write 7 pages of thoughts and feelings about the situation in my journal, I wasn't crying myself to sleep or anything like that. Who knows what is going on.....

anyway hi ho hi ho, it's off to work I go xx